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Court upholds Alabama ban on sex toys. WTF?!? There's a ban on sex toys in Alabama??? : reddit.com
Alabama's anti-obscenity law, enacted in 1998, bans the distribution of "any device designed or marketed as useful primarily for the stimulation of human genital organs for anything of pecuniary value."
The law does not ban the possession of sex toys, and it doesn't regulate other items, including condoms or virility drugs.
Residents may legally purchase sex toys out of state for use in Alabama, or they may buy sexual devices in Alabama that have a "bona fide medical" purpose.
(More like "boner-fied" medical purpose) hehehe
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Just say it's to relieve women's hysteria.
They probably still believe that's a valid procedure in that part of 'Merica.
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Welcome to Jesusland, home of Hypocrisy.
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Much like 420 pipes in the rest of the country, one must couch the truth in phrases like "phallus art" and "vibrating double-ended phallus art" etc.
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You cant be serious.
Id love to see a photo of that packaging.
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Ask and ye shall receive.
Here's columnist Molly Ivins in The Dildo Diaries talking about the anti-sex laws of Texas: http://youtube.com/watch?v=TYXUUsDGxkU
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That is comedy Gold!
How can such stupid and arcane laws ever get passed??
I burst our laughing at this (3:37):
"And what are these used for?"
"Well there are actually uh...
Butt plugs."
"Butt Plugs?!"
"mmm-hmmm"
"Ok, and these are for demonstrations as well?"
"Well these well uh, just go in the butt.
The anus is not defined as a sexual oraphis in texas law so you can buy whatever you like to go there."
edit: for structure
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Because otherwise, next week they'd be banning those home enema kits...
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Because if they can ban dildos the, they hope, they can ban contraceptives.
And then they can ban abortion.
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In Texas they have to be called "Demonstration devices" or something the like.
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I think you can get away with calling them "novelty items" as well.
You know, for displaying on the mantel, or perhaps in the trophy case.
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I thought they were cake-toppers
dammit, I can't find the comic by J Grant.
edit: found it, Texas cake-toppers
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The only thing the people of Alabama have to fear, are big rubbery dildoes themselves.
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They're banned 'cause whenever they see one, Satan puts dirty temptations in their minds to sit on it.
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There are similar bannings in Tennessee, Georgia, Louisiana(I think) and Mississippi.
South Carolina proposed one last year but I don't know if it passed.
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The southern US needs to grow.
The. Fuck. Up.
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I noticed that it mentioned Georgia in the article, but there are plenty of sex toy shops throughout Georgia.
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I checked it out and the Georgia obscenity laws were overturned in 2006.
Yay common sense!
Though new legislation could be introduced this year according to this: http://atlanta.creativeloafing.com/gyrobase/Content?oid=oid%3A66045
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Thanks to the wrap, I mis-scanned this as ``are big rubbery dildoes like themselves''.
:)
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So I read this assuming it was an ancient law that they just hadn't gotten around to changing and BAM: Alabama's anti-obscenity law, enacted in 1998
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They had to act fast before everybody started partying like it was 1999.
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I think it's time for this again...
"America!
Fuck Yeah!"
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Well, it has to be "Fuck yeah " because you can't do it by yourself.
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Texas also has a ban on trafficking in sex toys.
One can own them, but not sell them.
Funny tho, it does follow the Supreme Court's long held views on obscenity, that it must appeal to prurient interests, and that it must be offensive to locals.
Now, I've only been to Alabama once.
And that was on my way home from Georgia.
The girls in Georgia are pretty freaky (i knew one who had this sister...
Well not here i guess).
But never really knew anybody from Alabama.
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"They call Alabama the Crimson Tide."
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"....call me "Deacon Blue (balls)".
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I love her Quote: !
"My motto has been they are going to have to pry this vibrator from my cold, dead hand."
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So?
you don't like it - move.
you like it - stick around.
Who cares?
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Yeah, you go ahead and find someone who's willing to move out of state due to a ban on sex toys.
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Count me in
pun not intended
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In that case, getting sex toys would be the least of your concern, I would imagine.
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It all boils down to chaos theory
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So the Court didn't "uphold" the ban on sex toys, they declined to consider the case.
This is a HUGE difference;
Upholding the ban would legitimize the practice for other states, while declining to consider the question leaves the legality/constitutionality of the law undefined.
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This is a boon to my dildo smuggling operation!
twirls mustache and laughs maniacally
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Where do you hide those while crossing the state line...wait, don't tell me.
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Yeah, my dad was a moonshiner, but he gave it up to become a vibe runner.
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No sex toys in Alabama?
There's an Alabama?
I didn't know that!
(Don't get the wrong idea.
I was born in the south.) But--but...no more penises or vaginas too?
Aren't they sex toys?
I think the judge better recheck his definitions and reconsider or there won't be an Alabama for him to work in.
Everyone there will either die off or leave!
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But--but...no more penises or vaginas too?
Aren't they sex toys?
It's already illegal in most states to sell penises or vaginas, and nothing in this law bans possession or purchase elsewhere.
There's this wonderful thing called the "internet" that most people here in Alabama have high speed connections to -- I hear you can even buy things through it.
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I er, uh, was relating to the 'natural kind'.
You know, the ones that one is already born with...(I was making light of the situation...I'm a jerk like that sometimes.)--and I won't even go near the prostitution situation with this...opps, already did.
Now what?
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Since the article is only about sales, you had brought up prostitution with your original comment.
:) That's the part I was replying to.
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He could be talking about organ transplant.
But I'm pretty sure it's unlawful to sell your organs as well.
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Alabama, you got the weight on your shoulders
Thats breaking your back.
Your Cadillac has got a wheel in the ditch
And a wheel on the track
Neil Young
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Well I heard mister Young sing about her
Well, I heard ole Neil put her down
Well, I hope Neil Young will remember
A Southern man don't need him around anyhow
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In a 1995 Mojo Magazine interview Neil Young sums it up best, "Oh, they didn't really put me down!
But then again, maybe they did!
(laughs) But not in a way that matters.
Shit, I think Sweet Home Alabama is a great song.
I've actually performed it live a couple of times myself."
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Yeah, LS claimed the song was a joke, as they were big Neil fans.
There is no excuse for an 18-minute "Freebird," however.
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There is no excuse for "Freebird," however.
Fixed it for ya.
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Aww...but the piano sounds so purdy...
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It's not a sex toy, judge.
It is just a strange shaped cell phone set on...
....
Vibrat .
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If I owned a sex toy shop in Alabama I would abide by the law and clear out my shelves.
Then I would replace all the dildos with carrots, cucumbers and corn.
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Vibrating carrots, cucumbers and corn...
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No, better to sell an attachment to the carrots, cucumbers, and corn that vibrates it.
Market it as a ...
Food ... uhh ... oxidizer...
Then label it homeopathic.
Woo!
Homeopathic sex toys FTW!
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Domain registration for homeopathicsextoys.com in 3 ...
2 ... 1 ...
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"Yet another argument used by the ACLU in the Alabama case was that sex toys can often be used for therapeutic and medical purposes.
According to Lawless, women who have had hysterectomies and lost their sexual drives can often use vibrators to increase the blood flow to the vaginal area.
With this information, the Alabama legislature did add an exception.
You are exempted if “the act charged was done for a bona fide medical, scientific, educational, legislative, judicial, or law enforcement purpose.”"
Source: http://www.dailybruin.ucla.edu/news/2005/apr/11/isex-toy-sales-bans-absurd-inv/
Law enforcement purposes What the hell?
A substitute for the nightstick?
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I see an increase in the women with "hysteria"...
That's still on the books right?
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Ron Paul was right, we do need states rights!
/sarcasm
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Alabama has the right to invoke these laws.
And Alabama has the right to lose all of their half way intelligent residents.
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There are half-way intelligent residents in Alabama?
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Alabama has halfway intelligent residents?
Who knew?
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So the half that remains can pass even more inane laws?
Sounds like a plan.
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This is actually an attempt to start a legal challenge to Roe v Wade.
The legal underpinning of Roe is the case Griswold v CT.
The state of CT had outlawed the sale of contraceptives to unmarried people.
The Supreme Court ruled that some areas were so private that the state had to stay out.
The legal reasoning was then extended to cover abortion as well.
But if they can get the SCOTUS to rule that the state can ban sex toys, then the Griswold/Roe logic falls.
The Court will then have ruled that there is no area of your life that the government is not allowed to control.
For your Paul fans out there, this is something he supports as long as it is the state rather than the federal government doing it.
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That's a clever idea.
Do you have any sources handy?
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I am not sure what you mean by sources.
Do you mean for Griswold?
Read the Wikipedia article and the decision: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Griswold_v._Connecticut
For the logic, it stands by itself.
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Well, I was thinking more articles showing evidence, but I agree that logic stands on its own.
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The Court will then have ruled that there is no area of your life that the government is not allowed to control.
And libertarians think this is a good idea?
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Paul isn't really a libertarian...
He's a states-rights (true, not neo) conservative...
Standard Texan "Like a Whole 'Nother Country" complex he has...
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That's why they are forced to label them "adult novelties" and not "sex aids" ...
It's pathetic really.
What kind of a world do we live in when bringing pleasure to yourself or another person is against the law???
Maybe they think we would enjoy getting tazered in the genitals by the police???
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Maybe they think we would enjoy getting tazered in the genitals by the police???
If they thought that, it would not happen anymore.
Eureka moment incoming.
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"My motto has been they are going to have to pry this vibrator from my cold, dead hand.
I refuse to give up," Sherri Williams, owner of Pleasures stores in Huntsville and Decatur said.
Now ...
Is that REALLY where that vibrator is, her "hand"???
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Lopez said adult stores may be cautious about pushing the issue of what constitutes a medical device because the law has strong penalties: Up to a year in jail and a $10,000 fine for a first offense.
A second offense carries a prison sentence of one to 10 years.
10 YEARS!!!
For selling a frickin vibrator!!!
There are rapists and murderers who get that same amount of time.
So in the eyes of the Alabama Supreme Court, they would rather you go out and rape and kill than buy a sex toy.
Un-frickin-believable.
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Well ... I try to keep it clean as much as I can, although sometimes I fail miserably.
Also, it's my little homage to Eliot on Scrubbs.
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In this context, I think "fucking vibrator" is not only appropriate but also accurate.
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"They may buy sexual devices in Alabama that have a 'bona fide medical' purpose."
Read: For male stimulation, the medical purpose being ED.
The fastest way to get dildo's re-legalized.
Do a study that shows that if women can't have dildos, they will gravitate toward the larger members of the negroid race for satisfaction.
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Alabama doesn't need sex toys, they have plenty of corn on the cob.
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"Similar laws have been upheld in Georgia, Mississippi, and Texas, but struck down in Louisiana, Kansas and Colorado" - a clear geographic.
There are some strange ideas here in the South.
For example, and this is true, I had a conversation with a gentleman who insisted that 1) the bible was originally written in English, 2) Jesus was not a Jew, and 3) Jesus was a white guy with long hair and a beard, and 4) there are absolutely no similarities between Islam and Christianity.
It's hard being from the South sometimes.
:(
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Yep. If I cross the border into Alabama, I have committed a state felony.
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Every time a dildo brings a woman to orgasm an Alabama kitten dies.
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No one else's first thought was to blame the hooker lobby?
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I'm sorry sir but I'm going to confiscate your...
Penis. It is in violation of Alabama's anti-obscenity law.
Dear lord forgive me...
I said penis. *Blush*
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I guess they can make their own.
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They only define sex as an act between consenting adult men and sheep.
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